The Person in the Waiting Room: The Emotional Toll of Open-Heart Surgery on Care Partners ~ Emmanuel Mbaka

It's #AorticDiseaseAwarenessMonth and time to focus on the CARE PARTNERS!

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗣𝗲𝗿𝘀𝗼𝗻 𝗶𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗪𝗮𝗶𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗥𝗼𝗼𝗺: 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗘𝗺𝗼𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝗮𝗹 𝗧𝗼𝗹𝗹 𝗼𝗳 𝗢𝗽𝗲𝗻-𝗛𝗲𝗮𝗿𝘁 𝗦𝘂𝗿𝗴𝗲𝗿𝘆 𝗼𝗻 𝗖𝗮𝗿𝗲 𝗣𝗮𝗿𝘁𝗻𝗲𝗿𝘀 ~ Emmanuel Mbaka "The African Perfusioist"

We talk a lot about the person lying on the operating table.

But what about the person sitting in the waiting room?

The spouse.

The parent.

The child.

The sibling.

The friend.

The person refreshing their phone, watching the clock, waiting for someone to come through the doors and say:

"The surgery is over."

We sometimes forget that surgery affects more than the person having the operation.

Care partners can experience enormous emotional pressure.

They may be frightened.

They may not know what to expect.

They may have spent hours waiting during surgery.

And when the patient finally comes home, the worry doesn't necessarily disappear.

A new set of responsibilities begins.

Medications.

Appointments.

Meals.

Transportation.

Helping someone move around.

Watching the incision.

Listening when they say they're in pain.

And sometimes simply sitting beside them when they are having a difficult day.

The care partner may also feel that they have to remain strong.

But who takes care of the person who is taking care of everyone else?

Care partners need care too.

It is okay to say:

"I'm tired."

"I'm scared."

"I need help."

"I don't know what to do."

Asking for help isn't weakness.

It is part of caring for yourself so that you can continue caring for someone else.

And sometimes the patient may not realize how much their caregiver is carrying emotionally.

So if you're recovering from aortic or heart surgery and someone has been beside you throughout this journey, tell them:

"Thank you."

Thank them for sitting beside you.

For driving you.

For preparing your meals.

For listening to your fears.

For being there on the difficult days.

And if you are the care partner reading this:

You matter too.

Your wellbeing matters.

Your emotions matter.

Your recovery from this experience

tic surgery is a journey for the patient.

But it can also be a journey for the entire family.

And sometimes, the strongest thing a family can do is admit:

"We don't have to do this alone."